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An Open Letter To My Boy Mamas

Supporting Sisters

Written By Sammy Pandolfo
May 27, 2021

I always pictured myself as a mama one day. I dreamt about it. Felt it.
But being completely honest with you, when I’d fantasize about my family one day, I always pictured having girls. As the oldest sister of four girls, I just thought obviously I would have girls too.

boy mom playing basketball with son

And it’s not that I don’t get the boys. I also grew up with two boy cousins who were more like siblings than cousins. Not to mention, I was more of a tomboy as a kid (do people still say that?), and many of my best friends to this day are the guys from my high school. And I probably know more about football than your husband.

So I DO get boys. And hear it all the time, “Of course, you have boys! You are such a boy mom!” to which I know these comments are supposed to mean well, but I always think to myself, “Hey, I could be a girl mom too. I do have sisters.”

More honesty, finding out the genders for both of my boys was tough, especially the second time. I’d go back and forth from feeling disappointed – to feeling guilty for being disappointed when I was so incredibly blessed to be growing a healthy baby in my tummy.

Gender disappointment can be a real thing. It doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful for your baby or love them any less. So if you’ve ever felt that way, please know that is NOT the case, and you are a kickass, loving mama.

Now, let’s dive into the fun part!

mom in sunglasses smiling with son

Why I Love Being A Boy Mom

I will tell you, though, that being a boy mom just gets sweeter and sweeter with each day that passes.

As the last step of my 2.5-year old’s nighttime routine, we snuggle for a few minutes. The other day, his arm was under my back, so I tried to move it, and as he resisted, I said, “I’m going to move your arm, because I don’t want to squish it!”

He replied, “No, mama, you’re not squishing me. I’m holding you!”

And now, every night, he puts his arm under me and, I mean as proudly as humanly possible, holds me with an enormous smile on his face. I’m talking puts my head on his chest and everything. I melt.

Boys. Freaking. Love. Their. Mamas.

Before having boys, I was worried I wouldn’t have as close of a relationship with a boy as I would with a girl. I’m here to tell you, this boy loves me something fierce, and I can’t even find the words to explain how hard those feelings are reciprocated.

And although there likely isn’t a vast difference between a 6-month old boy or girl at this age (besides the better selection of girl baby clothes, haha)… I can’t wait for this mama/son relationship to grow with my sweet baby Cooper.


I’ll never forget being pregnant, walking through Target, seeing all the cute girl’s clothes, and then the AWFUL boys’ selection and crying. Yes, dramatic, but it happened.

Fast forward, and I’m obsessed with dressing boys! In fact, the abundance of options for girls almost feels overwhelming to me now that I’ve perfected my boy’s clothes strategy.

You have to be more creative with where and how you shop. Walking into Target, T.J. Maxx, or Old Navy, you won’t find the same affordable, stylish boy clothes that you’ll find for girls.

I’ll dedicate a blog post to all my boy clothes favorites, but here’s my general strategy: stick to cheap basics and invest more in shoes and hats. I’ll grab some of these cheap shirts ($1.50/shirt), paired with skinny pants ($9.99), and spend more on a hat ($24)!

The best part about hats is all you need is a few basic styles, and these hats are adjustable, so they fit for YEARS once you get out of the baby stage.

If you’re not a hat person, I still love the fresh basics on boys! Check out your local Nordstrom Rack for boy shoes. I’ve scored some of my favorite brands: Vans, Nike, Air Jordans, and Adidas. I’ll even buy sizes too big for them to grow into if I like the shoe!

My Promise To You

We are going to rep the boy mamas hard! Instagram is flooded with girl outfits and “twinning” with mamas. I always see an influencer with both a boy and a girl, but she will post so many cute girl outfits and barely any boy outfits!! So I’m here to help give the boys some space on the gram too!

Let’s celebrate that dressing boys are fun too! And represent the joy of being a boy mama.

My goal is to support you in any way I can raising boys. Sweet boys, who will become amazing husbands and fathers. I’m fortunate to have such a thoughtful and supportive husband – and the thought of raising boys that could be that kind of husband to someone, one day, brings me so much happiness and purpose.

Because the world could use more men like that. And we’ve been gifted the opportunity to raise boys that become kind and good men. So let’s support each other and make the world a better place with our boys, mamas!

Alright, what do you want to see, boy mamas? Outfits? Other suggestions?? Comment below or D.M. us on Instagram @supportingchaos!

author blog

Sammy Pandolfo

Hi! I’m Sammy, one of the two mamas behind Supporting Chaos! Below is a little background on me, but above all, thank you so much for being here. We are so excited to watch this community grow and support other mamas like we’ve been able...